Ma - Yim
chronicles of a road trip
We humans have a tendency to put reality into self-made stories - and then forget we are the ones that created that framing in the first place.
We then get awfully precious if someone has a different way to frame it.
I am no different and so one of the reasons I love art so much is that when done right, it offers a coherence that is beyond any reduction to one narrative or another.
I can drop the frame, and it’s still there, living.
So often, my position is to just let the music speak for itself.
But this time I really felt like honoring this particular flower by an artist’s commentary.
Consider this an exception — I am giving you the absolute minimum context to get into my world. It’s not a pre-requisite to enjoy the recordings if you do — but it might bring you closer to the source of the impulse. or not, I am honestly not completely sure.
So here it is as bare as I can, for you to see.
You can of course, skip reading all of this and just tune in directly with the whole playlist on YT.
I recommend having a good sound system, and please get comfortable, as some of these may take you on a little trip.
In any case,
Thank you for listening.
The Origins
Black Dolphin is what Sasha and I called it, from our first session together in Moldova, when the channel opened. I felt the Dolphin archetype flying through vibrational layers, scanning for play, opening columns of energy through high-pitched sweeps and ecstatic beats. (I was later told Black Dolphin is also a max-security prison in Siberia — fitting, for the un-caging we were doing.) A residency, a show at a local festival, and then Sasha was off to his summer plans.
The road trip
Together with my brother Artur and his son Osya we go through the balkans. Artur handles the instruments, the setup, the driving, the filming.
I do whatever's left.
Every place carries a particular charge. My practice is to arrive, listen, and allow myself to be touched.
Once the system's set up, I open my voice to whatever's moving through the place — translating it, letting it interact with whatever wants to form.
This only makes sense if we open to more than what is visible, recordable.
We understand that the situations we arrive at are not random. Setting up and transmitting is how we learn what each place is.
The sessions are a way for me to heighten my state of listening and give something enriched and powerful back into the field.
It’s all about Water.
All our transmissions happened around and in some ways about water.
Water is the quintessential representation of diversity through unity and models the flow of the internal water of the soul - the realms of emotion.
In Hebrew water is < מים ~ ‘Mayim’> - pronouns They/Them.
Mother is < אמא ~ ‘IMA’> - Calling for the mother, calling through the water.
And <‘מה אם? Ma - Yim’> means ‘what if?’— The dreaming question of Gaia.
The transmissions
Chisinau Moldova | kin 199, self existing Storm, Warrior WS.
Just before we left — a cozy afternoon at our 'home' field. I don’t have much to say about this one, only that it was much fun, and made me certain that the power can come even in the solo formation.
Braşov, Romania | Kin 206, White Spectral World-bridger.
This one was definitely darker, it poured that day and the gallery that hosted us didn’t promote the event so I ended up performing for 5 people, which, in all honesty was not easy on my already bruised artist’s ego- but that's okay!
What was the twinkle there was that Osya, who is eight years old was fully in, cheering on and even dancing!
The footage from that whole session feels a bit controlled, I did want to share just a tiny bit for wholeness reasons.
Craiova, Romania | Kin 209, Red Magnetic Moon (guided by its own power doubled), Moon WS.
Myself born on a moon kin (solar), this felt like the start of the actual movement. We got connected to Ramona - a local beginner sound healing practitioner, she was clear, welcoming and co-incidentally a week from her wedding. She brought us to a magnificent place.
Artur was setting up as I was swimming with Osya. When it was time to start I felt the river in my back, leading the flow effortlessly, it was such a beautiful experience.
Victor’s monument, Belgrade, Serbia | Kin 212, Self Existing Human (guided by the power of Elegance), Moon WS
This particular transmission was exceptionally intense.
I believe it was given to dissolve any rigidity of mind and enliven our hearts, but it also when the first real rupture in my relationship with my brother happened.
The location was right at the edge of the Belgrade fortress, in front of a statue called "Pobednik" - the Victor. It took us a while to find the right spot and there was also a girl, a singer, that Artur wanted us to meet - but she was not responsive, and careless with our time, and perhaps a little intimidated. In any case I had to express my boundaries in a harsh way and was not open to meet her.
Something else was coming through and I needed to prioritize.
We were a few meters away from an exhibition of old war tanks and since we set foot in that park I felt the heavy history of unresolved collective trauma in my subtle bodies.
It took all my focus to remember this is not about me - and not to make it about me.
The eventual transmission itself was powerful, I remember finding my an inner channel and I was just allowing it, like a pool of peace that allowed all of the heavy feelings through.
Later, Artur told me how painful this moment was for him.1
SeaSpace, Montenegro | Kin 214, White Rhythmic Wizard (guided by its own power doubled ), Moon WS
This was truly magical. We were driving the long and winding mountain road from Serbia to Montenegro and didn’t have a place to stay. I just got my period, and wanted to find a cozy space to chill and edit in peace. I decided to trust and see what happens.
Artur was posting in FB groups about our journey, trying to find accommodations and somehow we were invited for a barbecue.
We could not have prepared for what we found - a gorgeous, airy house with the Jamaican flag, and a group of expats welcomed us. It is a diving school, the host was a professional diver, a TED talker and a serendipity advocate. We set up everything on the roof, facing the incredible view of the Mediterranean.
This was more of a show in the best way - it had that magnetic contact with the audience and the most interactive, playful dynamic.
Ohrid Lake, Macedonia | Kin 219, Blue spectral storm (guided by its own power doubled), Moon WS
The last transmission of the trip was the most tranquil and harmonious — 3 years earlier I spent a month, also in July, reading Jung’s red book and into exquisite alone-ness.
But I was never alone, that lake has been my friend, and the very restaurant we ended up doing the session at is one of my favorite places. It was gently touching to return.
To know that we are there together, with all the limitations, disappointments, gifts and accomplishments of this very real love that we are sharing.
For a while nothing happened, there was no nervousness, no strong energy.
I then heard the rhythmic splashing of the lake’s waves - and everything flowed from there.
Just as the Wind Wave Spell began, we arrived back home.
The day after we had a simple jam with Nicu and Leonard on the roof. With only the drone machine on my phone, some bells and my voice.
The neighbour, who just came back from a healing journey in Ecuador, listened from her home and cried, the birds were circling in the skies, notating columns of air, out in the open.
The journey now continues in Berlin, where we're opening a laboratory for these explorations. If you're around, come by. And if the work speaks to you, feel free to share it with someone who might want to listen. more here.
Artur comments after reading a draft of this account: “I can say about our relations, they was not crackled) they became more alive, and maybe even better)), because we saw each other more as we are - sometimes angry dissatisfied disappointed regret etc the spectrum became wider))) not only sweet). So… I learned a bit about dark side of love.”